Friday, June 20, 2014

Being a stay at home mom isn't all soap operas and bon bons.......

Before we had kids, I really hadn't given a whole lot of thought as to whether or not I wanted to be able to stay home with the kids.  I honestly just kind of assumed that once the baby was 6 weeks old, that I'd go back to work, my child would go to daycare, and all would be well and good.

When I found out that I was pregnant with Cookie, I wasn't working.  I had gotten laid off in May, and was looking for something else.  We got word that we were going to be getting a foster placement, and that's when Hubby and I decided that I would just stay home with the kids, because we would have some extra money coming in to help take care of them, and since they were so young, and they'd been bounced around quite a bit, it would be easier for them.  I had gotten used to being able to go have coffee with my girlfriends when I wanted, and I knew that it would be a bit more difficult with the kids, but it would do them some good to be around other kids and things like that.

Once I was diagnosed with high blood pressure, I was really thankful that I was at home, because I could concentrate on making sure that Cookie was doing okay, and with the twins at school in the mornings, I was able to just kind of relax at home until I had to go pick them up.  Life with the twins was completely different because they had visitation with their dad, school, and other appointments that we were constantly running to.  The twins were placed with another family in the process of going home, since I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to handle them and a newborn, so I was able to relish in sleeping in and only having to go to my doctors appointments and eating whatever I wanted whenever I wanted.  I feel like I didn't get a true taste of what it was to stay home until Cookie came along.

After Cookie arrived, things were completely different for me.  There was no more sleeping in.  Ever.  For the first 7 weeks of her life, the only place that she would sleep was on my chest.  While I LOVED getting all that snuggle time with her, it was exhausting.  I pretty much didn't sleep for almost 2 months.  I would get a quick nap in while she was sleeping, but I was so worried about dropping her, or smothering her or something that my sleep was very short.  Once we moved from IL to TX, and she was sleeping in her crib, then I got a little bit more sleep.  Once she finally started sleeping through the night, it was definitely better.  But then came the napless days and crawling then walking and teething.  And on top of all of that, I decided it would be a good idea to go back to school with a brand new baby at home. HA!

I never really got the concept of being at home all day, every day, by myself while Hubby worked.  When we were in IL, Hubby was only working part time hours, so it wasn't really hard, because he only worked 5-6 hours a night, 4-5 nights a week.  After he started working in TX, he's been working 8-10 hours a day 5-6 days a week.  And that's when it became a totally different ballgame for me.

But, I will have to finish another night, because I am pooped.  I'm going to go to bed, because now that it's 2 AM, the kids are going to be up soon, and I have to get up with them.

Light, love and pretzel sticks.

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