Friday, September 21, 2012

Just a quickie...........

I'm flat out exhausted, so this is going to be uber short tonight.  Though it's not like I've been especially long winded lately, seeing as how I can't seem to remember to write a post 99% of the time in the first place...............

Anyway.....things are going really well with Lil Man.  He's getting big and is definitely nursing like a champ.  I'm having a MUCH easier time with him than I did Lil Lady....which is nice.  I think a lot of it is that I am more comfortable nursing this time around, and I frankly don't care what other people think.  I was so self conscious when I had Lil Lady that if we were out anywhere, even at Hubby's brother's house, I would give her a bottle of formula long before I would even attempt to nurse her.  Lil Man has only had about 8 oz of formula since birth, and most of that was additional supplementation right after birth to help with his jaundice.

I am SO lucky that I have been able to stay home with my kids so far, but I am going to HAVE to get a job.  Trying to live on one income is almost impossible with 2 kids.....I don't know how single parents do it.  I really don't.  Anyway....

Hubby & I decided that we don't want anymore kids.  We've always said that we only wanted 2, and since we have our 2, we're done.  My monthly cycles have always been awful, with the cramping, etc, and after having Lil Lady, they just got worse.  After talking to my OB, we've decided that the best course of action is for me to have a partial hysterectomy.  I had to wait for approval from my insurance company, and we finally got that, so I'm scheduled for surgery next Friday, the 28th.  I am all the sudden REALLY nervous about it.  I know that it's what I want, because I do not want to have to deal with the awful periods that I've had for more than 1/2 my life anymore.  I'm not worried about wanting more kids eventually, because like I said, Hubby & I only ever wanted 2 kids.  I think it's just because I have a brand new baby at home, and since the hospital is 45 minutes away, Hubby isn't going to be able to bring the kids up to see me every day.  I am worried that my milk supply will dwindle since I won't be able to breast feed Lil Man for 3 days.  I think that the other part of it is that I figured it would be done through laproscopy, and it's not going to be.  I will have about a 5-6 inch incision.  I won't be able to lift more than 10 pounds for 4 weeks....which means that I will have to have my parents' help with Lil Lady, getting her up from her nap and putting her to bed at night.  I'm not real happy about that either.  She'll do fine, just like she did when I was on bedrest, but I hate putting my parents out like that.

Alright, I suppose this is it for tonight.  I'm pooped.  I think I'm going to pick up my boy, nurse him and head to bed.  After I take a hot shower that is. :)

Stay safe and be blessed my friends, until we meet again! :)

Friday, September 14, 2012

Another month gone by....

And I'm still working on trying to get a schedule down between Lil Man and Lil Lady. *sigh* It's definitely tough going from one to two....but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the entire world. :)

I have been SO tired, and haven't been sleeping well at night because Lil Man seems to still have his nights and days mixed up.  He's up 3/4 of the night, and then he'll sleep 3/4 of the day.  I'm about to lose my mind, because it's not like I can nap during the day when he does, because I still have Lil Lady to take care of.  Now if they are both sleeping (like they both are now) then I will sometimes lay back in the recliner and catch a couple z's.  But I also realize that when they are both sleeping is really the ONLY time I have to get house work and such done.  I really need to figure out some better time management or something, because since Hubby is the only one working, I really feel like I should be the one to keep the house up.  It's just tough to find that least for me.  I've gotten more accomplished the last couple days than I have in the last month since Lil Man was born, and I'm sure that's because when he does sleep at night, he's sleeping for about 5 hours....which is AMAZING.  He doesn't sleep that long all the time, but he has been here lately, so I'm hoping that he's on a good trend of continuing it....though I better knock on wood, because the last time I said that, he stopped sleeping at night

I have been thinking a lot lately about how lucky I really am.  I have a wonderful husband, who works SO hard to provide for his family.  I have not had to go back to work, and hopefully if I do have to go back, it will only be part time.  It's nice knowing that I can stay home with the kids and take care of them, and not have to work a 40 hour week where I would most definitely be miserable.  Being a mom has been the greatest gift that I ever could have been given.

If you would have told me 5 years ago that I would be a mom to 2 beautiful kids, I would not have believed you.  We tried SO hard to get pregnant, and had so many disappointments, and it was such a dark difficult time in my  life.......I was ready to give up.  I was ready to throw in the towel, and be happy being a foster mom and nothing more.  I prayed many a night to be able to carry a child and have a baby of my own, and here I am, with 2 beautiful bundles of absolute joy.  I look at their faces and I'm filled with so much happiness and's absolutely the most amazing thing ever.  I couldn't imagine being happier than I am right now.

Though things with the kids have been great, there's been a bit of sadness around here.  My SIL as I mentioned before, I think, has moved out of state with my nephews, leaving my brother.  Things have been tough for them for the last couple years, and things finally came to a head and she took off with them.  I miss them like crazy...not  just my nephews, but my SIL too.  She came back down here last week with the boys to get some of their stuff, and so they got to see Lil Man for the first time.  We did get a picture of all 4 kids together, and in it my nephews and Lil Lady are ALL smiling and looking at the camera!! :) I was SO happy.  It's an awesome pic....I posted it on my personal Facebook page, and will get it up on 1st Time Mama after I get this blog posted.  I hope that if this is what she really wants that things work out for her.....but I miss her and wish that her and the boys would just come home. :(

Anyway....I suppose this is it for now...I'm going to shut my eyes and try to get a little nap in before the kids wake up and Mom gets here.

Stay safe and be blessed my friends, until we meet again.