Thursday, May 30, 2013

Playing catch up...........

So, depending on how my computer decides to act, this may be pretty short.  It's not wanting to cooperate...typing is a big pain in the ass.

The last couple of weeks have been VERY stressful.  The people who own the house that we are renting have decided that they want to sell and do not want anyone in the house while it is on the market (so it apparently makes more sense to them to LOSE money while they wait for it to sell) and they wanted us out by tomorrow.  So, I've been trying to find us another place to live.  We luckily found a place, that is going to end up costing us less than this house.  My brother is going to be living with us, which is a stress in and of itself.  I LOVE my brother, but there are times that he is a complete putz.  I can only hope that things will iron out as we learn one another's quirks, and we'll just go from there. 

The house is a 4 bedroom, 3 bath, large kitchen, 2 car garage, 2 fire places, large back yard.  My brother will have my nephews over the summer, so that will be nice too.  Stressful, but nice.  So, anyway, we are going to hopefully start moving this weekend.  I would LOVE to have everything moved by Sunday, but I think that is probably pretty unrealistic.  Especially seeing as we have 2 kiddos and my parents can't keep them the whole weekend.   I wouldn't ask them to either.  It is no easy thing to handle a 2 year old and a 9 month old at the same time.  I am hoping they will agree to keep the kids some, because I am ready to just get moved.

So, my computer is just not cooperating, so this is it for now.

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Long days and looking for a job

So, things have not panned out the last couple months like they were supposed to. And it's a big pain in my butt, and causing me a lot of undue stress. I try to take each day in stride, and for the most part,  I do fairly well.

My laptop is giving me fits all the sudden, not quite sure what the problem is there.  I had a lot more I wanted to try and get out, but with the laptop not cooperating, it's not gonna happen.  In fact, I think this is going to be about it for tonight.  I know, I know, it's short, but it's after 1 am, I'm pooped, and I have to get up at a decent hour tomorrow so that I can go to my mom's for a bit.  I will hopefully have an easier day tomorrow............though, it's hard telling if it'll actually happen the way I think it will...........

Until later, sweet dreams, happy thoughts and lots of cookies. ;)

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Bedtime is over-rated........

Or something like that.  I should completely be going to bed, because I am EXHAUSTED, but I wanted to continue my story telling before I completely forgot the things that I wanted to say in regards to all of it..............

So, I left off with telling my parents (and everyone on God's green earth) that we were pregnant.  It was absolutely wonderful getting to tell everyone and feeling like things were going to be okay.  I started this blog not too terribly long after that. 

In November, we found out that baby was going to be a girl, and of course everyone was absolutely thrilled.  Hubby was even excited, which I have to be honest, surprised me.  When the midwife told us that she was 99% sure that it was a girl, the grin on his face was so memorable.  I will never forget it.  It wasn't long after that appointment that I was diagnosed with high blood pressure, so I had to see a maternal/fetal specialist for the rest of the pregnancy.  Which was scary, but honestly was okay with me, because it meant that I got to see her at every appointment, because they did a sono every appointment.

The rest of the pregnancy was pretty textbook honestly, and since I already posted it, I won't go into the details of her birth.

I will however, tell you all that without a shadow of a doubt, the birth of my daughter was the defining moment of my life.  It sealed for me that I was definitely meant to be a mother. 

So many emotions surrounded her birth and continue to surround her in general.  I continue to thank God every single day that He blessed me with her.  We went through so much to get her here, and there were times that I was ready to give up and say screw it.  And we nearly did.  Something told me to just give it one more month....and I did, and she's 2 and funny and looks like me. :)

This was the day she was sleeping beauty.
This one isn't super recent, but it was the most recent one I had on the computer.  It was taken late last summer after Lil Lady's brother was born.

Her smile is infectious, and you can't help but laugh at some of the things she says and does....including when she tries to throw a fit about something, because 99% of the time, it's a completely fake fit.

Right before our girl turned 1, we found out that we were pregnant again....completely unexpectedly.  And to top that, when we found out, I was already 16 weeks.  Yep, I really could have almost been on that "I didn't know I was pregnant" show.  Ha!

Well, this is all for's late and I need to get to bed.  I have a pretty full day tomorrow, and I'm watching my nephew for my brother.

Have a wonderful night my friends.  Until we meet again.

Saturday, May 11, 2013

And the saga continues..................................

So, I have been gone for a while, because things have just been kind of crazy.  We went on vacation, and since coming back, we've just been kind of busy.  My brother and sister in law left today for Japan. :(  Makes me incredibly sad.  I've had a bit of a hard time today, obviously, but I'm dealing with it okay.  I promised you all that I would continue my story to mommyhood, so I suppose I need to keep my promise.

So, I left off with us getting the phone call on August 2nd that would change so much......

Let me back up a little......I got on that eating healthier, quit smoking kick, and I was doing really well with it.  Hubby and I talked, and we decided that we were going to give having a baby of our own another shot.  We tried unsuccessfully in June.  I told Hubby at that point that we were going to try one more month, and then I was done.  I couldn't emotionally go through everything that we'd been going through anymore. 

So, on the morning of August 1st, I got up early, because I just couldn't sleep, and I knew that it was time to test.  So I did.  And it was positive.  And I immediately called my best friend and told her.  I was scared, and almost couldn't believe it.  I told Hubby and we both kind of said, okay, let's see what happens.  That was a Sunday.  I knew I couldn't get into the doctor until the following day, so I just kind of went through the rest of the day feeling scared and wondering if my little bean was going to end up being okay.

August 2nd, Monday, I woke up early again, went to the bathroom and called the doctor to try and get in.  Then I realized that I was spotting.  My heart sank.  I knew that it was over.  I called those that I had told about the positive test, and cried.  I was convinced that the pregnancy was over.  I didn't call the doctor's office back, because I thought I would give it til the end of the day.  My appointment had been scheduled for the following day, so I figured we would go from there.  I laid down on the couch, because I was just beyond devastated, so I thought I would try and sleep it off.  My phone rang a few minutes later, and because I was in the middle of a cry fest, I hit ignore.  The voicemail tone went off and I decided to listen.

It was our caseworker, calling to say that they had a potential placement for us, a set of twins, and that I needed to give her a call so she could give me specifics.  I called her back right away, she told me about the placement, and I said I would have to talk to Hubby and get back to her.  We discussed it, and I told him that I needed it, in case the pregnancy went south, and so I called our worker back and told her that we would take the twins.  We got them that Friday, and man, were they ever a  They really were good kids, and adorable to boot. 

I had gone into the doctor, and they did some bloodwork, and my numbers were going up like they were supposed to.  We went back the following week, they did more bloodwork and a sono, and we saw the baby's heartbeat.  I still didn't feel that everything was going to be fine, so we opted to not tell the majority of our friends and even our parents/families.  I was just too scared of having the "oh, wait, no I'm not pregnant" conversation again.  The followup bloodwork showed that some of the numbers were going up, but my progesterone wasn't going up like they wanted, so I had to go on progesterone suppositories.  Those were NOT fun.  They made a mess, and were just flat out uncomfortable.

Things were going well with the twins.  We established a relationship with their dad, and we opted to supervise the visits so that they didn't have to meet at the office to do them.  It just felt like that was too stiff and uncomfortable for them all, and the twins had a much more difficult time at home after a visit at the office.  Once we started supervising, the twins did much better.  They handled coming back to the house from the park and the discipline issues were at a minimum.  It also gave me a chance to get to know their dad, and to see how he really was with them.  Eventually we started having him over to our house for dinner on the nights of his visits, once the workers increasedhis visitation hours.

Things seemed to be cruising right along with the pregnancy too.  I felt sicker than a dog almost all day long, and especially when it came to smells.  I had a hard time changing diapers, because that smell made me nauseated.  I still to this day don't like the smell of raw hamburger cooking in a skillet.  But, I was glad to have the symptoms.  SO very glad.  At 11 weeks, which was a Monday,  I went in for a pap smear and appointment.  I was growing right on target, according to the doctor.  After the pap, she said not to be surprised if I spotted that day or the following.  I didn't, so I figured all was good.  On Wednesday, I got up and started my day, and noticed that there was a tiny bit of pink on the toilet paper.  I passed it off as my eyes playing tricks.  I went to the bathroom a lil while later, and this time it was definitely there....only bright red this time.  I called the OB and while waiting for someone to call me back, I freaked out and went to the hospital.  I was waiting to be seen when the OB called me back and told me to come in for a sono check.  I went in, everything was perfectly fine, baby was moving and heartbeat was strong.  I breathed a huge sigh of relief and went home to my hubby and the twins.

At that point, since I was almost out of the first trimester, we decided to go ahead and tell the masses.  I got my parents on the phone and webcam, and was able to show them the sono pic.  I will never forget the look on my mom's face as long as I live.  It was the best moment.  I only wish it would have been in person, but at the time, we were in IL and my parents were here in TX.

This is going to have to be it for tonight............I'm flat out exhausted and I can hardly hold my eyes open anymore.

Stay safe and be blessed my friends, until we meet again.

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Missing in Action................

So, I've been a little MIA here lately....things just got kind of kooky around here.  After my last post, we took a trip back to IL to see friends and family.  It was a good trip, albeit too short.  I got to see most everyone that I wanted to, though I didn't get to spend nearly enough time with each of them.  I wanted much more time with my bff, but that just didn't happen.

Things have been crazy and hectic, and don't look like they are going to be slowing down anytime soon, either.  My brother and sister-in-law are leaving on Friday for Japan, I need to get started with work, and school is making me crazy.

I posted on my Facebook page about needing some prayers for my here's the scoop.  He wasn't feeling well, so he went to the doctor, and they found some issues with his heart.  They admitted him last night (Monday night) and ran some more tests and did a lot of bloodwork.  They did an echocardiogram today and it came back okay.  The plan at this point is that they are going to put in a pacemaker tomorrow.  All the tests and bloodwork that they did showed that there was nothing physically wrong, just that the electrical impulses were not/are not doing what they should be doing.  The pacemaker is a pretty routine thing, but I am still beside myself about it.  Because of Lil Miss and Lil Man, I can't go to the hospital to be with them, but I did get to talk to my dad, and he sounded in good spirits.  The surgery is scheduled for noon tomorrow (Wednesday) and if all goes well, Dad'll come home on Thursday.  My mom stayed at the hospital with him tonight, and my brothers are going to go be with them tomorrow so that Mom isn't alone.  Hopefully Pastor is going to head up there tomorrow too, and so that will just give my mom especially some added comfort.

Well, I suppose that I should close this out for tonight.  I'm exhausted, and I have a full day ahead of me tomorrow.  I promise I will continue the "Journey To Becoming a Mommy" saga.....I will try and get it done tomorrow.

Until next time, stay safe and be blessed my friends. <3