Thursday, April 28, 2011

Should be sleeping.....

But, I find myself WIDE awake....isn't it amazing how that happens?  I was feeling SO tired earlier, while I was feeding Lil Lady, I got her to sleep, got myself a glass of chocolate milk, and snuggled up to try and get some shut eye, and now I'm wide awake.  I think it's probably because I have a gazillion things running through my mind these days.  I'm trying to make sure that I have all my ducks lined up in a row for the move, and I constantly feel like I'm forgetting something.

I've called the moving company and got that done.  Although, I need to call Mom at some point today and have her get me the address of the storage place that we're going to be using so that I can let the moving company know where they are going to deliver our stuff.

I have my books for school...which starts on May 2nd.  I'm a bit nervous about how I'm going to juggle that and Ava and working, but I think between Mom, Dad and hubby, I should be alright.  I'm very much looking forward to getting my degree, and being able to better provide for my daughter.  I would love to be a stay at home mom, yes, but I just don't think that's a realistic possibility for our family.  Plus, I have to be honest, as much as I LOVE being home with her, I find myself searching for a reason to go ANYWHERE, just so that I can get out of the house.

We got Lil Lady's birth announcements in the mail today....I need to sit down and get them addressed and sent out.  Although I have to go to the post office before I can actually send them, because I have to get stamps.  I think I have 1 left, and that's actually going on Mom's Mother's Day card so that I can get it in the mail tomorrow.

It's still almost surreal to me that Lil Lady's actually HERE.  I know that sounds absolutely insane, especially considering she's almost a month old, but I still look at her in complete awe.  We tried so long, and so hard, and I'd seriously started to give up hope of us ever having our own child.  And here she is, beautiful and growing every day....and she's MINE.  I think back on the day she was born and I relive it in my mind all the time.  I don't think I was more in love with Hubby than I was the minute he looked at me with tears in his eyes seconds before he cut her cord.  I really didn't think I could love him more than I did the day we got married, and then our daughter was born.  I'm sure everyone is getting sick to death of me talking about it, but it's just so all consuming.  She fills a void that I didn't realize was so big.  I get teary eyed just thinking about how full she makes my life.

In 3 weeks, we are making the big move....and I seriously CANNOT wait.  My sister in law, D, and brother, JM, are coming up to help get us and our crap down there.  We do have a moving company coming to get the majority of our stuff.  The only thing we'll be loading in the vehicles is the stuff that we're taking to Mom and Dad's with us.  I'm SO ready to get out of Illinois, it's not even funny.  Yes, I have friends here that I'm going to miss terribly, but it doesn't outweigh how much I miss my family.  I can't wait to see the look on my mom's face when she holds Lil Lady for the first time.  Dad too.  It's been a long time coming, and I'm SO ready for it.

I need to figure out a day that I can try and get together with the friends from here that are important before we leave.  It would have to be the weekend before we leave, but I have NO idea where to have it....guess I need to put some feelers out on Facebook and see what everyone thinks, and see who can be where and when will work.

I suppose I should try and get a little bit of rest before Lil Lady wakes up.  I have a busy day ahead tomorrow (well, today) with things I need to get done.  And I have a visitation to go to tonight.  Bleh.

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